Muslims WorldWide

G20 Ends Abruptly as Obama Gets A Hissyfit And Calls Putin a Jackass


6a00d8341c60bf53ef019104bc0958970c130905-flashpoint-hmed-10p-photoblog600al-Aqsa Islamic Brigades, an affiliate to the Obama supported Syrian rebels, posted this picture on their facebook page a few days ago with the White House blown up and burning in the background.

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The jackass lectures Putin about being a jackass!
Obama’s ego has been out of control for a long time. The man suffers from a condition where he becomes a legend in his own mind. President Obama seems completely oblivious to who the real jackass truly is in the Syria issue. He may be advised to use a mirror.
President Putin is in fact getting more and more support around the world, as the smarter and more capable man. Something Obama lost several years back, around the time he was issued a Nobel Peace price for doing – absolutely nothing. Obama is one of the most despised U.S. president’s in American history. A gnome rather than Mount Rushmore material.
Meanwhile Iran has threatened to rape one of Obama’s children over his Sunni support to bomb Syria. Syria is defending itself against islamist invasions, funded and lead in secret by Sunni Arabs, who have pressured for attacks on Syria for the past 2-3 years with support from Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Turkey and Jordan. Incidentally one of the rebel arrests for possession of chemical gas made a few months ago, took place in Turkey. Surely Erdogan was disappointed that one of his police officers was diligent in the Southern part of his country, and actually arrested and thwarted one of his rebels.
Enjoy the fun by the Borowitz report!

The Borowitz Report

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G20 Ends Abruptly as Obama Calls Putin a Jackass

Posted by

obama-putin-g20-580.jpeg
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ST. PETERSBURG (The Borowitz Report)—Hopes for a positive G20 summit crumbled today as President Obama blurted to Russia’s Vladimir Putin at a joint press appearance, “Everyone here thinks you’re a jackass.
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The press corps appeared stunned by the uncharacteristic outburst from Mr. Obama, who then unleashed a ten-minute tirade at the stone-faced Russian President.“Look, I’m not just talking about Snowden and Syria,” Mr. Obama said. “What about Pussy Riot? What about your anti-gay laws? Total jackass moves, my friend.”

As Mr. Putin narrowed his eyes in frosty silence, Mr. Obama seemed to warm to his topic.

“If you think I’m the only one who feels this way, you’re kidding yourself,” Mr. Obama said, jabbing his finger in the direction of the Russian President’s face. “Ask Angela Merkel. Ask David Cameron. Ask the Turkish guy. Every last one of them thinks you’re a dick.”

Shortly after Mr. Obama’s volcanic performance, Mr. Putin released a terse official statement, reading, “I should be afraid of this skinny man? I wrestle bears.”

After one day of meetings, the G20 nations voted unanimously on a resolution that said maybe everyone should just go home.

Alexander Zemlianichenko/AP

18 thoughts on “G20 Ends Abruptly as Obama Gets A Hissyfit And Calls Putin a Jackass

  1. Pingback: We’ll just drop the bombs, no american blood will be shed. |

  2. you people are crazy.. CRAZY.. i hope you know this.. because everyone else knows it… AND Obama is one of the most internationally loved Presidents.. more than that dumb ass George Bush.. who I am sure you supported.. because you all sound like dumb hicks from trash holes that have nothing better to do.. please read the actual Quran.. you will see its almost identical to the Bible and the Torah.. except for the not worshiping Jesus as god part.. Muslims revere Jesus as a prophet.. and that top line never came from the Quran.. and the Prophet Muhammed did not consummate his marriage with 9 year old Aisha.. get your fuckin facts right you dumb back woods morons.. you suck the life out of society

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    • The koran is a book of nonsense that cannot stand on its own feet-it is without context and does not contain enough information for one to become a muslim,that is why the sira and sunna are necessary (despite alla making it easily understood) It is a book of hatred unlike the bible which is a history book and when you compare Jesus and muhammed
      Muhammad said Allah hates those who don’t accept Islam. (Qur’an 30:4, 3:32, 22:38’0
      Jesus said God loves everyone. (John 3:16)

      Muhammad said “I have been commanded to fight against people till they testify that there is no god but Allah, and that Muhammad is the messenger ofAllah.” (Muslim 1:33)
      Jesus said “He who lives by the sword will die by the sword” (Matthew 26:52)

      Muhammad stoned women for adultery. (Sahih Muslim 4206)
      Jesus said “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.” (John 8:7)

      Muhammad permitted stealing from unbelievers (Bukhan 44:668, Ibn Ishaq 764)
      Jesus said “Thou shalt not steal” (Matthew 19:18)

      Muhammad permitted lying (Sahih Muslim 6303, Bukhari 49:857)
      Jesus said “Thou shalt not bear false witness.” (Matthew 19:18)

      Muhammad owned and traded slaves (Sahih Muslim 3901)
      Jesus neither owned nor traded slaves.

      Muhammad murdered those who insulted him. (Bukhari 56:369, 4:241)
      Jesus preached forgiveness.

      Muhammad said “If then anyone transgresses the prohibition against you, transgress ye likewise against him.” (Qur’an 2:194)
      Jesus said “If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.” (Matthew 5:39)

      Muhammad said “Jihad in the way of Allah elevates one’s position in Paradise by a hundred fold.” (Muslim 4645)
      Jesus said “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called Sons of God.” (Matthew 5:9)

      Muhammad married 13 wives and kept sex slaves. (Bukhari 5:268, Qur’an 33:50)
      Jesus was celibate.

      Muhammad had sex with a 9 year old child. (Sahih Muslim 3309, Bukhari 58:236)
      Jesus did not have sex with children.

      Muhammad ordered the murder of women. (Ibn Ishaq 819, 995)
      Jesus never harmed a woman.

      Muhammad said “O you who believe! Fight those of the unbelievers who are near to you and let them find in you hardness.” (Qur’an 3:110)
      Jesus said “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the Earth.” (Matthew 5:5)

      Muhammad ordered 65 military campaigns and raids in his last 10 years. (Ibn Ishaq)
      Jesus ordered no military campaigns, nor offered any approval of war or violence.

      Muhammad killed captives taken in battle. (Ibn Ishaq 451)
      Jesus never took captives; never killed anyone.

      Muhammad encouraged his men to rape enslaved women. (Abu Dawud 2150, Qur’an 4:24)
      Jesus never encouraged rape; never enslaved women.

      Muhammad was never tortured, but tortured others. (Muslim 4131, Ibn Ishaq 436, 595, 734, 764)
      Jesus suffered torture, but never tortured anyone.

      Muhammad said “And fight them until there is no more persecution and religion is only for Allah.” (Qur’an 8:39)
      Jesus said “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” (Matthew 5:44)

      Muhammad ordered a slave to build the very pulpit from which he preached Islam. (Bukhari 47:743)
      Jesus washed his disciples feet. (John 13:5)

      Muhammad demanded the protection of armed bodyguards, even in a house of worship. (Qur’an 4:102)
      Jesus chastised anyone attempting to defend him with force. (John 18:10-12)

      Muhammad advocated crucifying others. (Qur’an 5:33, Muslim 16:4131)
      Jesus was crucified himself.

      According to his followers, Muhammad had others give their lives for him. (Sahih Muslim 4413)
      According to his followers, Jesus gave his life for others. (John 18:11 and elsewhere)

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  3. President Obama continues to lead the United States in a manner that makes me proud to be an American. All this Middle Eastern nonsense is all just that…nonsense

    Salami – on rye with mustard.

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  4. On the judgement Day, u will definitely be raised to Answer this lies u wrote about my beloved prophet Muhammad (pbuh) and Our beloved Mother Aisha (ra)……..Soon u will face what u v been doubting……Salam

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  5. Salam,

    I would remove this article for fear of looking silly, as this article was taken from a satire (comical) reportage, known to have “established itself as a pre-eminent forum for serious fiction literature and journalism.”

    So, although it makes great news, alas it is fictitious.

    I hope this clarifies it a bit more 🙂

    Salam,

    Sharif

    Like

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